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Archive for the ‘Boyos’ Category

July 25 ’09

Today was a rare day where my beautiful boys and I were alone from daybreak to sundown.  I know many mothers have days like that all the time, but with so much family around its very unusual for me.  In general I’m very grateful for the support of other adults – I’d go insane without their help! – but on a hot lazy summer day it was rather pleasant to cater only to our own whims.

In a mad bout of industriousness, last night I prepared all the food we would need to spend the day on Jonah’s property in Rocky Mountain House, where Si was helping Jonah build his workshop. At the last minute Silas and I decided I should stay home with the boys instead, so we had monstrous amounts of picnic food prepared for the day. This led to a cheap and very convenient mall expedition! I took the boys to put together activity packs for our upcoming voyage to Australia.

Dair and Malkie were both very interested in playing in the play section and didn’t have much input into what I was buying at the time.  Mack was very on the ball though, and asked for the play area as soon as we stepped out of Wal-mart! At the play area there was another 3 year old boy that Dair got very involved with, playing wild games of Monster chasing. It will be interesting to watch Dair’s behaviours when he goes to daycare in September, as he was very good at playing with the other boy as long as that boy was following Dair’s directives. If the other boy tried to take charge, Dair simply ignored him and carried on with his own game!

Malkie, as usual, played nicely with all the kids and randomly switched to do his own thing. His own thing mostly involved jumping from precariously high places. This is right in line with his current theme of jumping from unsafe places all around the house. I’m at a bit of a loss as to how to teach him some discernment. I don’t want to instill unnecessary fear, but I don’t want him hurtling off cliffs either! I’m afraid this might be an ongoing discussion in Mackie’s life.

Malkie fell asleep on the way home and stayed that way for a good long while (thank goodness – half hour naps are killing both of us!)  I sorted through the activities and Dair latched on to the two transformers immediately. It was interesting watching him. I showed him once how to do the Bumblebee car and then he was able to do it as well as figuring out Mack’s Mudflats one. He undid and redid them for a good hour. Then he seemed to have it straight in his head and moved on to playing with them as cars. Even more interestingly to me, he was quite excited to have a transformer because “Stefan doesn’t even know that we have transformers too!” Right beneath my eyes, totally unbeknownst to me, my son had been indoctrinated into What Is Cool by his cousin. I didn’t realize he even knew what a transformer was; he was overjoyed to now be in the inner circle of “haves”. It broke my heart a little – I know it’s impossible but I would have wished for my children that they could be pure individuals without feeling peer pressure. It also adds to my hesitation about putting him in daycare in the fall – I’ve kept my kids so deliberately innocent and I’m not sure I’m ready to give that up. When I think of it that way it makes me even sadder for Malkie – shouldn’t I be protecting him at least as long as his brother? I am still really struggling with the mothering/my own mental health balance.

The evening was lazy and mostly fun. Easy dinner, playing in the yard. There was an incident where I was on the phone with Si and I heard “Bang. SCREAMOFANGER. Bang. SCREAMOFANGER. (Repeat)” I ran outside and demanded to know what was going on. The boys were standing on opposite sides of the deck and Mack was holding a large landscaping rock about half his own size. Dair said “Mackie was throwing rocks at me” I replied “And you just stood there and let him?” “Yes.” “Well how stupid is that? Why didn’t you move?”

I also told Malcolm to CUT IT OUT. He loves to throw almost as much as he loves to jump, and repeated NOs don’t seem to impact him at all. I really do need to figure out how to get through to that smiling, disarming ball of nerves.

I put the boys to bed in the cool basement and tonight it was Dair’s turn to not sleep for hours. I think they must be in cahoots to have it alternating so smoothly between them. At long last he did sleep though.

One other note – my baby robins opened their eyes today and they are far, far less ugly now 😀

I am thankful for long hot summer days and for beautiful intelligent boys.

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